ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY AT IMAX 3D

Watchable. I was apprehensive about "The Stories". What's more, as I try not to read about movies before seeing them, I expected a spin-off. Luckily it's nicely and meticulously written into the original low-tech trilogy and the "Star Wars" Universe and you know straightaway when it's happening. Filmed on locations in Iceland, Jordan and the Maldives which gives the feel of the reality of the diverse galaxy as well as impressive sceneries. One major well-known character appears alongside brief cameos of three others. Music by Michael Giacchino smoothly blends with the famous "Star Wars Theme" by John Williams. A number of protracted battle scenes. Very standard jokes with occasional few good ones e.g.: "I'll be there to protect you. Caspian told me I had to." Amazing shots of planets from space. The movie runs at 80% of the force (pun intended) till it evolves into a delightful ending. In the end I also got to love the two new heroes. As with original "Star Wars" there are no scenes during or after the credits but I just loved the score harmonising with the original score by John Williams.


16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

WRONG ELEMENTS

Watchable. While you can find out what has happened and what is happening now to the Ugandan child soldiers or learn about the current Lord's Resistance Army position, it's a partly French film which means the predictable: the camera just follows the young people talking while visiting sites with no editing or commentary. Apart from me not being fond of such kind of documentaries, from time to time it hinders making out what they're referring to in their conversations and remarks.


RADIN! (PENNY PINCHER!)

Watchable. It's a moderately witty comedy - I loved the orchestra playing "The Four Seasons" in 12 minutes but didn't laugh out loud much - except for the sad and cheesy ill daughter subplot which turns it into a drama only to return to a comedy at the end.


16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

THE FATHER, THE SON AND THE HOLY JIHAD

Watchable. Gosh, is it chaotic! A family torn between advocating for ISIS, being a moderate muslim and staying away from religion makes for a hot subject but lousy editing ruins the experience.


SNEZNAYA KOROLEVA 3. OGON I LED (THE SNOW QUEEN 3: FIRE AND ICE)

Watchable. Although the title looks like a citation of "A Song of Ice and Fire" by George R. R. Martin, it's anything but. It's just one of a few pop culture references in the movie. There are some funny situations and cute animals (birds and an ermine). However, it all appears to be merely a cartoon version of fantasy movies for teenagers. The Snow Queen fairytale reduced to pop pulp.


GLOBAL MIGRATION FILM FESTIVAL


AND WHO TAUGHT YOU TO DRIVE?


Watchable. A very interesting account of dos and don'ts in different cultures. Could be easily titled "Driving round the world". In India the car will always malfunction, this way or the other. In Japan every little gesture matters and it sometimes takes seven attempts to pass the test but with no attention to detail you will never succeed. In addition the Japanese don't speak English (no wonder if their English teachers dream of quitting the job). In Germany the instructor was the most sexist of them all. Very informative and fun to watch. Only the editing had a field for improvement.



KONWOJ

Watchable. There have been Polish movies about how bad policemen are. This one's about bad prison transport officers. Excellent gradation of tension but, due to a shoddy editing, a bit unclear at times. I'm waiting for a film about the failing judicial system.



PASSENGERS 3D

Recommended. From the first sight of the travelling spaceship you know it's going to be fantastic. Mind-blowing visually. One of swimming pool scenes is like nothing I had seen before, in any movie. Neither had Jennifer Lawrence. The story contains the best elements of "The Martian", "Gravity" and... lots of surprises. The script by Jon  Spaihts (the writer behind "Prometheus", "Doctor Strange" and upcoming "The Mummy") is a complete vision of the future and of people's personalities and motivations combined with a thought-provoking moral dilemma. Genuine space opera. Better than the latest "Star Wars".


PO PROSTU PRZYJAZN

Watchable. Finally a Polish film where all dialogues are perfectly audible and clear. Too many prolonged scenes with slow music. Little humour, most of it at the beginning of credits. No scenes after the credits. The best roles are the truly comic ones by three supporting actors: Anna Polony as Patryk's grandma, Magdalena Warak as Ivanka's sister and Jan Peszek as the hospital director.

RESTER VERTICAL (STAYING VERTICAL)

Watchable. Very good: clear, naturalistic, yet deprived of vulgarity sex scenes are juxtaposed with a baby crying for a bigger part of the film. There are also a clear scene of gerontophilic homosexual sex and another of straight-in-your-face birthgiving which I found a bit disturbing. However the wolf scene is excellent. The storyline's quite peculiar - it's tongue-in-cheek but doesn't make anyone laugh. The main protagonist is striving to survive but takes a downfall, especially once the baby is born. I'm not sure what the movie is meant to be. A contraception pill?

JOSEPH AND MARY

Watchable. A typical Biblical story: quiet, correct, touching and seen a hundred of times already.

PUSTINA - EPISODES 1 & 2

Watchable. Filth rules - both physical (no one washes their hands after using the toilet) and moral. Made to imitate Scandinavian crime series but with focus on the lower class. The second episode is more interesting than the first, you know already who is who so you can start guessing whodunnit. Yet, the Pustina town is made to look so ordinary it's not a must see. So while the girl's disappearance is intriguing, seeing the serial means watching lowlives for 8 hours in total.


16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

TONY (THE CHOCOLATE CASE)

Recommended. Time to face it: I'm guilty of slavery. It turns out that cocoa plantations are ridden with slave labour of children who don't get paid, are starved and whipped. Dutch Tony Chocolonely brand was set up to eradicate it. It's growing and, as the director said during the Q&A after the screening, some regular brands have vanished from the market since so that's optimistic. But most of all, the humble beginnings, when journalist Teun van de Keuken started investigating the chocolate production ethics, are hilarious. The film is very infomative, e.g. debunks the myth that Fair Trade equals ethical, transparent and monitored. So altogether it's clever, funny and disquieting at the same time.

16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

IKONA (ICON)

Watchable. The film lacks cohesion. While part of the disarray comes from the contorted relationships in the mental hospital, e.g. the birthday cake scene, where the hapless patient gets practically told off for having caused the problem of baking the cake, appears in between numerous shows of affection of the personnel towards the ill, the doctor's philosophical musings are out of the blue.

HOOLIGAN SPARROW

Watchable. The case of a school director who abused 6 of his female charges is just a pretext to present current day China where high officials find it "fashionable" to rape underage girls and authorities systematically threaten human rights activists and raid their offices. It's also more about the activist's life than about the case. So it's for viewers interested in China as a country rather than in women's rights.

WALKA Z SZATANEM (THE BATTLE WITH SATAN)

Watchable. No wonder the film met with neither outrage nor praise from the side of the Church. It's quite low key. The topic is controversial: Poland is Europe's unfamous leader in the number of exorcisms and most of the alleged possession victims are females between 15 and 25. While it's clear from the film that some children are forced to attend religion lessons and then get coerced into undergoing the rites which guarantee regular profits to the Church, it all can be read between the lines only.

FANG DEN HAIDER (CATCHING HAIDER)

Watchable. An interesting portrayal of a tremendously popular politician. While it says a lot about Joerg Haider's background and political tactics, what comes to the fore is his impact on people. He was a keen observant, with outstanding memory of people's names and faces, just as much as a shrewed manipulator. A natural born leader. Beautiful views of Austria - similar to Switzerland - and local festivities are a delight too. The director's personal commentary doesn't help to understand some local dealings though. It would be better as a biopic rather than a political reportage.


LA LA LAND

Watchable. I was afraid the jazz music might be too much for me and that I would walk out like from "Excentrycy, czyli po slonecznej stronie ulicy" or "Whiplash". Anything but. It's mild jazz, pop, 80s, really light. What's more, it's truly catchy, the music just stays with you. The story is also light, good for a musical, a bit cliche, especially as it associates happiness with having a child as the culmination of a relationship. J. K. Simmons, known as the teacher from "Whiplash", plays a small part. There's nothing over or after the credits so you can leave as soon as the movie ends.

In between the screenings I overheard a peculiar conversation between two Muggle journalists: "There's a 'Star Wars' screening on Wednesday." "Again?! There's been one already!" "That was last year. There's a new part coming out."

SOLIDARUCHY Z RAKOWIECKIEJ

Watchable. A very fresh documentary about former Solidarnosc activists talking about their imprisonment. Some funny bits, e.g. about the political police from Katowice driving a Varsovian activist to the jail in Warsaw - they didn't know the city so the arrested guy had to guide them, or prisoners' pipe dreams of becoming the director of a jail for communists. Some grim ones - about brutally murdered freedom fighters and conditions of their incarceration. A number of talking heads droning on. Who-is-who notes are given at the very end which renders a big part of the film incomprehensible to people like me.

The film will be shown on Channel 2 of Polish Television at 10:55 p.m. tonight.


16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

THE LAST LAUGH

Watchable. About whether you can joke about the Holocaust or not. Of course you can. Provided you're Jewish. I'm not but some jokes are so tactful even I can quote them: "Two Jews were sent to assassinate Hitler. They were waiting outside his quaters as he was to come at 8. Half an hour passed. He didn't turn up. An hour passed. He was still not there. Two hours passed and one Jew says to the other: 'He's still not here. I hope nothing's happened to him.'" or "My mum was a Holocaust survivor. Sorry, she was the alleged Holocaust survivor." Several other jokes were told in the film. Unfortunately, most just weren't funny.

16. INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL WATCH DOCS

AU NOM DE L'ORDRE ET DE LA MORALE (IN THE NAME OF MORALS AND ORDER)

Recommended. Coercion into sterilisation, nuns torturing children and priests raping them, forced child labour don't sound like... Switzerland, do they? A hard-hitting film about how all of this was either inevitable or even desirable in the society of a few decades ago.

CURUMIM

Recommended. The whole film is pleasing to watch. The main protagonist is a very nice guy whose life was so fascinating it could be easily made into a Hollywood blockbuster: drug-dealing while paragliding, a spectacular escape, an Indonesian prison onto which venomous snakes are thrown from the air daily. The ending in the form of notes informing you of the latest fate of the portrayed people comes as a shock.

DESTRUCTION OF MEMORY

Recommended. Scenes of world-famous monuments of culture being blown up are thrown in the midst of the discussion so abruptly they startle you. It's a scientific fact that genocide is always preceded by the demolition of the ethnic or religious group's material culture. The film chronicles such devastation from World War Two Dresden and Warsaw, through former Yugoslavia, to ISIS destroying Timbuktu and Syria. Owing to the demolition of cultural artefacts having been recognised as a war crime, counteraction is being taken in Syria. Nearly a military operation in itself.

A157

Watchable. Nothing really new about ISIS enslaving Yazidi teenage girls. I learnt about dots round the neck of one of the opressors with words "open here" and people making a living of looking for relatives of those in the refugee camps. Other than that it's just the slow routine of life in a muddy camp.

#MYESCAPE

Recommended. The subject of recent refugee migration has been all over mass media for a couple of years now so I thought I had seen it all. But here you get ordinarily looking people, including some really hot guys, who have been to hell and back: have spent thousands of dollars, trekked through a dessert, travelled in nearly air-locked carriages, struggled not to fall asleep to be able to keep balance on a dinghy brimming with people and done most of that at gunpoint. Recorded with their own candid cellphones. Makes impression.

The film is available for free online. The makers didn't put it on Youtube but someone did and the producers don't mind.


SCOPE 100

LA TORTUE ROUGE (THE RED TURTLE)

Watchable. Very good beginning. Thirst you hear music similar to sea waves, then you see the castaway. Later on the animation with few colours but of numerous shades is the main attraction. The film is slow but in a calm manner so it's quite relaxing. What perplexed me was its nonsense natural geography: as far as I'm aware, the only seals living in the tropics are those off the coast of California where the cold current runs. But such a current wouldn't be favoured by sea turtles.

SZCZESCIE SWIATA

Watchable. It's weird and makes no sense but the weirdos are charming in their period style.

SKWAR (HEAT)

Watchable. About nothing but short at least (8 minutes).

LA DANSEUSE (THE DANCER)

Watchable. It's in fact about two dancers - one who made it through hard work and one with incomparable talent who made history. Beautiful Lily-Rose Depp as Isadora Duncan. Both dancers blew me away with their choreographies. Unfortunately the dance scenes appear quite late in the film and aren't that many. The story's a bit disturbing as Maire-Louise Fuller had to start her career through bed, there are also games played between potential lovers: her and Isadora, her and Louis etc. Very French in that.

OFFICE CHRISTMAS PARTY

Watchable. Fun starts shortly after the party does which means you need to wait through the interesting, yet not hilarious, built-up to get the situation humour that'll make you laugh out loud several times later on.

TONI ERDMANN

Watchable. It is long (162 minutes) and it feels long. All the film I just kept waiting to learn what the corporate rat woman's father came to teach her. It's nothing special and nothing obvious till the end. It was only after the screening that it finally dawned on me - the joker father is more authentic in his disguises than his daughter is in her business suit. Romania is a perfect setting for pretenders as, with its largest shopping centre nearly empty, being too expensive for the general public to shop, it's one huge mask as well. I only felt sorry for the hot Romanian guy who seemed to have human feelings. The film's a praise of being oneself and true to one's values whatever they are.

LA FILLE INCONNUE (THE UNKNOWN GIRL)

Watchable. Dark and heavy, getting heavier and heavier as the story develops. About guilt. The dark side of society is juxtaposed with the unchanging calmness and kindness of the young female doctor trying to uncover the dead girl's identity. Very French - events take place as if in real time. The mystery keeps you on the edge of the seat. Very good, tense. Doesn't really evoke any other emotions.

GLOBAL MIGRATION FILM FESTIVAL

THE GOOD LIE

Recommended. It throws you in the middle of a Sudanese child refugee life: the heart-wrenching scenes in Sudan, the foot journey of over 700 miles to Kenya, resettlement to the US after 13 years in the camp, cultural blunders, e.g. calling the job agency worker, who has helped them a lot, "Yardit" meaning a "great white cow" to which she reacts: "Well, I've been called worse" and battling with horrible memories. Very well acted by actual refugees, including two former child soldiers. Impossible to stay indifferent after the movie.

Ex-president Komorowski popped in the cinema with his wife after the movie. He had a quick chat with the festival organizers before going to see "The Handmaiden".

OCHO APELLIDOS VASCOS (SPANISH AFFAIR)

Watchable. Well scripted and acted but quite impenetrable. I've been to both Seville and the Basque Country and I speak some Spanish, yet I was perplexed. The Polish translation retaining a lot of Castillan and Basque expressions didn't help. If you're not Spanish, you put so much effort into distinguishing which is which, what it means and why it's funny that you fail to laugh. So it's fun but more of linguistic and cultural interest rather than comedy. One important message from the film is: if you want to overthrow your government, don't smoke! The excise tax funds the regime.

THE FOURTH PHASE

Recommended. Stunning cinematography and a fantastic score by Kishi Bashi accompany a story of endurance driven by love of all the four phases of water. There's just one joke: "Hey, mum! I did it. No, she's not pregnant. I'm talking about snowboarding." Yet, the whole thing is entirely entertaining and makes you feel the power of following your own path. A must see. Numerous scenes during and after the first credits.

LASSEMAJAS DETEKTIVBYRA - STELLA NOSTRA (THE WHODUNIT DETECTIVE AGENCY)

Watchable. The film's silly and lacks humour but the acting, dubbing and costumes are perfect for a children's movie. Lets you unwind.




FIVE FLAVOURS FILM FESTIVAL

경성학교: 사라진 소녀들 (THE SILENCED)

Recommended. Unpredictable for a larger part and mysterious. The best part is you never know which way it's going to turn as the very genre is not clear till the end.


SULLY

Recommended. A film about the emergency landing on the Hudson river requires tension to be gradually and precisely built up. This film meets the condition. It's also remarkable that all the rescue took just 24 minutes and everyone survived. New York response workers are really something. Tom Hanks' performance is touching. When you get to the scene about Christmas cards during the credits, that's it, that's the final.

POWIDOKI (AFTERIMAGE)

Recommended. Four bleak years of stalinism. A free-thinking artist is dismissed for political reasons, thrown out of the artists' association and left without any sustenance. Makes you wonder if all non-religious and non-national art is going to get banned in the current situation in Poland. You'll find some comfort in it being "just a wind of history which always passes". Very well acted and scripted, pulling you in deeper and deeper. Tragic and moving.

KOLEKCJA SUKIENEK

Watchable. 8 popular actresses and 1 actor tell life stories. Lots of natural-looking close-ups give the impression of having conversations with them and the stories are very life-like so it feels cosy to follow them. You just feel like one of them. Everyone has some unfulfilled dreams and disappointments with partners or regrets about having children. The man in the ending feels like from a different tale. The film should have ended with the conversation about death.

BAD SANTA 2

Watchable. Gross and hardly funny but at least with a cohesive storyline. The female security guard has a fabulous Christmas lipstick.


WARSAW JEWISH FILM FESTIVAL

A PICKLE RECIPE

Watchable. A feel-good family movie and satire on Americans trying to cash on everything. The comedy bits could be funnier though.


LUX FILM DAYS

A PEINE J'OUVRE LES YEUX (AS I OPEN MY EYES)

Watchable. "Mustang" it isn't - it's too political and too Tunesian. The music's not too bad but the story's not fully transparent for people outside the portrayed country. Also the bit about the singer's boyfriend is too frustrating in its chauvinism. It's like he's doing whatever he likes and she gets the blame.


LION

Recommended. A tear-jerker from the 18th minute but so beautiful and touching to the core it's a must-see. Wonderfully acted and shot. Arresting scenery of Tasmania's Wellington Park plays a significant role too. A great movie to be released before Christmas. Makes you want to reunite with all your relatives.

According to the writer Luke Davies, the first 40 minutes were modelled on "WALL-E". Dev appears only in the 55th minute, the 2nd act of the film.

FALE

Watchable. The family, relationship, school and planning for the future issues of two hair-dressing trainees are easy to follow even if marred by poor music. Sadly it ends nowhere. An interesting scene is training shaving on a balloon - if you cut the surface, it bursts. I hope the real training looks just like that!

KEKSZAKALLU

Watchable. It was killing me with boredom till the ending where one of the girls drops her upper-middle-class life to leave for Brazil though lacking any knowledge of geography. Only then did I get the meaning of the film. What makes you change your life doesn't have to be any misfortune. Boredom is a sufficient trigger. What enlivens the 72 minutes of the film are scenes depicting Argentinian lifestyle, my favourite being cooking an octopus - the first time for me to see that. The eponymous Blue Beard is just the symbol of the unknown, no violence here.

If you're going to be around Wroclaw on 9th or 11th December, you can land a 6 zl ticket to see Pierce Brosnan or Wim Wenders at Kino Nowe Horyzonty. While in Warsaw, a big night will be the 15th December when the two new screens at Muranow will be officially opened.

FIVE FLAVOURS FILM FESTIVAL

ANTIPORNO

Watchable. A bit like "The Duke of Burgundy" - the roles both are ambiguous and get reversed. The topic is quite feminist and lesbian too. Visually much more attractive though. At least it's colourful.

A YELLOW BIRD

Watchable. Singapore boasts itself on its cleanliness, orderliness and high standard of living. This, in turn, is a sordid, seedy picture of the city-state: illegal migrant workers, lawlessness and moral filth. Interesting to see the hidden part but the movie's slow, disturbing and bleak.

FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM 3D

Recommended. Newt Scamander has arrived at the cinemas worldwide. New York is considerably more interesting with his fantastic beasts and the final havoc resembles "Ghostbusters". The 3D's really good. I have the impression the movie would gain much when watched at IMAX. Plenty of typical for Rowling humour, e.g.: "I'm not dreaming." "How do you know?" "I haven't got the brains to make this up." The American legilimens can't read an Englishman's mind because of his accent and Muggles are called No-Majs in the New World. I've got the whole series of "Harry Potter"  books and "The Tales of Beedle the Bard" and "Harry Potter and the Cursed Child" but not "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" because, from what I saw when I browsed it years ago, it was a mere description of 85 magical animals. The film however has got a complex storyline by, no less, J.K. Rowling. Very well acted, especially by Dan Fogler as Jacob Kowalsky and Alison Sudol as Queenie. All the animated creatures are delightful as well. One resembles a sloth, another one a mole, but both these and several other have their peculiar behaviours, some funny ones, like the niffler. Dubbing in the Polish trailer sounded forced.

The trailer of the lego Batman film featured Starship's "We Built This City" song. The animation didn't look enticing but, who knows, with such music it might be fun.

INNER WORKINGS

Recommended. A funny and clever short film preceding "Moana". About professional burnout and healthy lifestyle.

MOANA

Watchable. It starts with an utterly annoying raspy voice of an elderly woman (at least in the Polish dubbing) but bear with it - it's just a moment. The rest is quite pleasant, even if some dialogues and songs are overlong and silly. The water of the tropical ocean shines, Polynesia is bright and full of colour, or stars at night, the people have lovely big eyes, the cock with a coconut shell on his head makes everyone laugh. It's an easy to follow tale of how strong a little girl can be. Above all, enjoy Oceania!

ZACMA (BLINDNESS)

Slept through. Boring and stupid, philosophical and theatrical.

PAKT - SEASON 2 EP. 1

Watchable. It's amazing how political Polish people are. The series is a compilation of well known events from the Polish political arena barely disguised with the change of names. Unfortunately TV news are normally far more exciting. Besides, I couldn't make out parts of the dialogues.

I also tried playing the Pakt Escape Room VR game but got so frustrated with either the zoom or the earphones refusing to work that I abandoned the session.

NOCTURNAL ANIMALS

Watchable. The opening sequence is striking. I read its symbolism as the ugly naked truth of America which gets flaunted constantly one scene after another. The film consists of two stories. I liked the "real-life" one about relationships in love, family, at work and it being set partly in art galleries (fragment of my world too). The "fictitious" tale is boring, especially its initial violently dynamic bit. Random violence is so cliche in American movies. It gets better when the police officer-victim bond is created and when the investigation progresses. The whole film ending is astonishing. Superb cinematography underlines the sharp contrast between the high life in the "reality" and the torching sun as well as dimly lit night in the Texas desert in the "fiction".

CINEMAFORUM

The festival comprises of, in a bigger part, workshops for young filmmakers in which they work on a short film. As Arkadiusz Jakubik put it, it "dziala, nie zawsze, ale dziala" ("works, not always, but works"). This year the winning amateur short films were:

KAROLA

Watchable. This is how to move a viewer within a few minutes. Unfortunately, the happy ending's out of the blue.

ASFIKSJA

Watchable. Each workshop participant presents their cliche script, weird colours are used on purpose. Well acted. Shamefully, the film lacks sense.

Among other productions, "Dom" won the Best Animation prize. As I've written before, I found it mediocre.

Presenter Mateusz Damiecki told some actors' jokes: "An actor is someone who, riding a bike through a dark wood at night, keeps the light on himself." and "How do you recognize an actor at a party? He'll tell you himself."

Finally, two of the awarded independent films were shown:

CZARNOKSIEZNIK Z KRAINY U.S. (THE WIZARD OF U.S.)

Watchable. Composed of interviews conducted in Hollywood in 2014, with excellent modern animation, it tells about moving countries: the reasons and the outcomes. The experiences, however, are just like anyone else's: two people attracted to each other never end up together as a result of playing games meant to attract, someone spending Christmas in bars, people making their own living.

NADEJDA LEPSZE CZASY (SOMETHING BETTER TO COME)

Recommended. Such tragic stories I was crying from the beginning to the end. It's worth seeing the lives so miserable you just wouldn't believe possible. Homelessness and living on a rubbish heap in their stark clarity.

A note about "Dywizjon 303" - an upcoming Polish movie about the legendary pilots fighting in the Battle of Britain: the distributor has withdrawn due to the change of scriptwriters and historical truth. This is how politics is ruining one of our potential blockbusters.

THE ROLLING STONES OLE OLE OLE!: A TRIP ACROSS LATIN AMERICA

Recommended. Even if you have known little about the Rolling Stones, the film will make you a fan. The cinematographer Jonas Mortensen makes the most of the bright sunlight in Latin America, its stunning locations, architecture and of the band's bright outfits: adjusted to contemporary fashion, yet so much rock'n'roll. The single rain scene looks superb too. The band members are all athletic, well-cultured and just charming. They all have the charisma they never bring up discussing their undiminished popularity. It's very informative about the band, the tour management and even politics. The musicians provide insight into how when something gets banned it immediately gets devout followers as well as why dictatorships delegalized rock music. It's a music documentary so, obviously, it's filled with music and dancing. Sitting in a comfy cinema seat is a perfect way to absorb the sounds in 5.1 and the pictures on a big screen. It's so vibrant and exhilarating it's just pure pleasure.


SPUTNIK RUSSIAN FILM FESTIVAL

INTIMNYE MESTA (INTIMATE PARTS)

Watchable. How much can lighting affect a movie! It's a nearly asexual film about sexuality. So, while it's barely exciting, the very topic never bores. It tells about all sorts of harmless perversions. Most of the actors are fat and ugly and their characters have issues with satisfying their peculiar needs.


PATERSON

Watchable. A slow-paced but pleasant film about a small town full of little dreams of its endearing inhabitants. I like it how late it's revealed where the town is. For a bigger part you think it could be anywhere in the US.

QUACKERS

Walked out. The movie was as disorderly as the kids around and the Polish version's dubbed with irritating voices.

The trailer of an upcoming film about a dog getting reincarnated at the same owner's, "A Dog's Purpose", looks enticing.


NIGHT FILM MARATHON - THE MARATHON OF PITBULL

A nice touch was starting the marathon with a slot of actors greeting the viewers, talking about their transformations into the characters and warning: "Tylko mi nie spac!" ("Don't you dare sleep!")

PITBULL

Watchable. Not everything was clear and some bits were hard to hear, even at my second viewing. Still, I liked it better this time. Some scenes are hilarious, e.g. "Ucz sie zawodu" ("Learn the profession") one or when a police officer disables a bribe of 500 thousand dollars and gets 800 zlotys as a reward for the deed. The final song has good lyrics.

PITBULL. NOWE PORZADKI (NEW ORDERS)

Recommended. Great music, the character of Strachu is introduced and remains the highlight of the second and third part of the trilogy. The scene with him complaining about shoes is brilliant. Kura has got a fancy shade of blue nail polish. Top notch action.

PITBULL. NIEBEZPIECZNE KOBIETY (TOUGH WOMEN)

Recommended. No worse than the second film. Strachu again and, additionally, a gang's own lawyer. Perfectly scripted again.

SNOWDEN

Recommended. We live in the world of total surveillance: our emails, calls, text messages, chats, Facebook accounts are tapped into, webcams and mikes used even when the computer is off, naked scanners search our bodies, we spy on people we know and don't know, information is everything. Joseph Gordon-Levitt looks much like Edward Snowden, just as Rhys Ifans resembles Corbin a lot. We get to know Snowden's full story, including him never having completed a school, his army service, as well as his love life. The plot is tense with the Rubik's cube scene being the highlight. Very well cast, structured and much revealing. It ends with some real life footage bits extending over the first credits. Great music score.

PLAC ZABAW

Recommended. Very well shot by Mateusz Skalski. Lots of clear close-ups, some CCTV footage, distant takes - all playing a role here. Excellent actors, including the very young ones. An uneasy watch about how cruel children are and about how it goes top-bottom in families.

SPUTNIK RUSSIAN FILM FESTIVAL

SOLARIS (1972)

Watchable. The 2002 American version was, as my friend put it, "about Clooney's arse", so I decided to see the Soviet version by Tarkovsky. However ancient it is, it hasn't really aged. Still, the 159 minute running time is too long. The suspense created at the beginning gets ruined by all the slow scenes. In fact "Solaris" by Stanislaw Lem is one of the books I have at home but have never had time to read. I believe it must have been groundbreaking at the time. The topics tackled, according to the adaptation - who's really human and "Flatliners'-like chance of atonement - have reappeared in science fiction several times. The thoroughly psychological insight into both of the issues at the same time is the main value of the film. It's just too slow to grasp.

NEBESNYE ZHENY LUGOVYKH MARI (CELESTIAL WIVES OF THE MEADOW MARI) (2012)

Watchable. Meticulous house and dress decorations hide lewdness and vulgarity. Fascinating and revolting at the same time.

LIFE, ANIMATED

Watchable. A typically American documentary where the voice is given mostly to the protagonist's family members. Luckily, due to swift editing, it's all mixed with Disney movie excerpts and, also, you shortly get to follow the man's love issues and him being such a cute person, this is the highlight of the film.

In the meeting following the screening I learnt about Wojtek Przybyszewski Jr. - an autistic boy who improves Disney films. He corrects inaccuracies in pictures as well as changes scenes for happy ones if they look too threatening. Shame he's not exhibiting in Warsaw now.

TROLLS 3D

Recommended. Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake dubbing the leading roles as well as John Cleese as King Bristle Sr. await you in the original version and nobodies in Polish. However, the tale is so delightful I loved it even translated and even though some songs are unrecognizable in Polish. The trolls here are cute and Smurf-like, just more colourful. The story's also Smurf-like + lots of hit pop songs. It was just so much fun I didn't even mind the presence of kids (although I admit sitting in a safe distance).

"The Baby Boss" trailer looks promising: good 3D and an intriguing plot.

GIMME DANGER

Watchable. I couldn't care less about a rock band composed of school drop-outs who quickly pick up drug habits eventually leading to the demise of the Stooges. I watched it partly as a comfort movie about people whose lives were thoroughly miserable which just made me feel really safe enjoying all sorts of creature comforts daily and partly to see who that famous Iggy Pop was. Only for die-hard dinosaur rock fans.

THE 9TH LIFE OF LOUIS DRAX

Watchable. For the first half I couldn't make out the sequence of events as the action jumps to and fro in time and some scenes are dream sequences or phantasmagories. When I finally got what it was about, it turned out to carry a criminal mystery and that was truly involving. Sarah Gadon looks so beautiful and innocent with her blonde hair and deer-like eyes she's a perfect cast.

ARRIVAL

Watchable. The Sapir Whorf theory is nearly a century old. Known by linguists and philologists, was mostly referred to in situations where cultural differences came up. Only recently have psychologists come to the conclusion that it's easier to solve a problem if you switch to another language. In the film the Whorfian hypothesis is pushed to the limits of imagination. It's the core of the film. Unfortunately the sentimental beginning and ending, with the scientist's obligatorily terminally ill daughter is terribly tacky. Also, the happy ending has a logical gap - is her daughter going to fall ill again?

Strangely the Polish title is totally different from the original which caused confusion even among film journalists some of who didn't recognize the long expected release.

THE WARSAW KOREAN FILM FESTIVAL

인 허 플레이스 (IN HER PLACE)

Watchable. It attempts to show tragic consequences of intervening into a young girl's life but, with such poor acting, fails to move the viewer (or me at least).

암살 (ASSASSINATION)

Watchable. Chaotic. Without the knowledge of Korean history I just couldn't work out the whole political plot. The part with twins was about the only one I understood. Good acting and witty dialogues (e.g. "Didn't you sign it with your own blood?" "Yes, I had an attack of anaemia afterwards") save the film.

THE WARSAW KOREAN FILM FESTIVAL

뷰티 인사이드 (THE BEAUTY INSIDE)

Recommended. Truly beautiful, also on the surface. The story, music, actors are all alluring. But the core is the subtly presented story about our insecurities in love relationships. One is the fear that the other person won't accept us on the days when we look worse. The other is the woman's fear of being left by someone who can easily disappear without a trace. Also, it shows how the person has to get used to us, whatever we are. It just stays with you.


NIGHT FILM MARATHON - THE NIGHT OF HORROR

I skipped "Ich seh, ich seh" ("Goodnight Mommy") and "Lights Out" which I had seen and reviewed earlier.

THE WINDMILL MASSACRE

Watchable. The slasher's main murderer looks like Leatherface. A good idea to make all protagonists sinners who have to repent but their individual stories don't get developed. A sequel is very likely.

SUMMER CAMP

Walked out. It's just rubbish. An empty camp before the opening of the season. Four American workers and some Spanish locals. 20-some minutes into the movie one of the guys attacks another one, growling and biting, and it's not even the one who got bitten by a dog earlier. Shortly afterwards another one does the same.


THE WARSAW KOREAN FILM FESTIVAL

지금은맞고그때는틀리다   (RIGHT NOW, WRONG THEN)

Watchable. Two distinct parts. In the first one all protagonists are extremely polite and kind to each other. In the second things go wrong quite a few times but people are more authentic and fair to others. It's funny to hear the "director's" evasively courteous comments in the first part. In the second he's more to the point even if that upsets people. The finale though shows things end better when people are honest. An interesting concept, still the story could be less mundane, especially that you follow it twice.

베테랑 (VETERAN)

Watchable. While it starts with slapstick, the large middle part is dramatic and brutal. The director Ryoo Seung-wan is Park Chan-wook's fan and friend and you can see it in the film. The ending is lighter again. The comedy bits aren't really funny though and the highlight is the psychopath running the corporation.

FIVE FLAVOURS FILM FESTIVAL - ASIAN HORROR NIGHT

곡성 (THE WAILING)

Watchable. Rushing from "Veteran" in a different cinema, I arrived in the middle of this lengthy production. I'm happy I didn't have to watch it all. Beautiful landscape shots, e.g. a scenic serpentine road + exotic local folklore mixed with a shoddy storyline, poor acting and class B horror. Scary it isn't, pathetic rather.

손님 (THE PIPER)

Watchable. Just like the one above so I'm copying and pasting: exotic local folklore mixed with a shoddy storyline, poor acting and class B horror. Scary it isn't, pathetic rather.

貞子 vs. 伽椰子 (SADAKO VS. KAYAKO)

Watchable. A spoof of both "Ring" and "Ju-on" ("Grudge"). Silly but involving when you've seen them all.

THE WARSAW KOREAN FILM FESTIVAL

According to the brochure, the festival focused on the Korean new wave.

상의원 (THE ROYAL TAILOR)

Watchable. The director, Lee Won-suk, has a great sense of humour. He announced his work saying: "The film may seem boring but please bear with it as I'll be counting you and watching who's leaving." The first part of the film is also witty but in a silly way. The more dramatic second part is much better. Apparently the casting was very quick which is remarkable hence all the roles were cast and acted with virtuosity. As it was a historical movie, movements were minimal but emotions were expressed clearly. So-yi and the queen's dresses were strikingly beautiful and the scenes of each of them entering the courtyard are well worth seeing. The film director "got the royal robe after the shooting and wears it after a shower". Having said that, I have to add I don't like crowds, they're confusing to me and this film was just packed with characters I couldn't identify.

Lee Won-suk is a fan of Sorrentino, Wes Anderson and old Polish films by Polanski. And it wasn't me who asked him this question. Others were curious of it too.

The lecture on new Korean cinema by Andrzej Pitrus was skippable. The professor said only obvious things, like that you won't recognize landmarks in movies shot in Korea.

THE YOUNG POPE - EPISODES 1 AND 2

Recommended. Paolo Sorrentino seems to associate Venice with young age - it featured in "Youth" and now in the upcoming HBO GO series. His pope is young, telegenic, has a flair for marketing, happens to fantasise about sex (would you expect nudity in something titled "The Young Pope"?), wears red shoes, smokes and wants Rome to become a suburb of Vatican City. He grins constantly, says outrageous things, is totally unpredictable which all give the film strong suspense. The dialogues are absolutely brilliant. The pope's first homily is formidable. I felt as taken aback as the crowd in the second episode final scene.

HACKSAW BRIDGE

Watchable. The first half is annoyingly sententious and religious, the second (the battle) extremely brutal. On the other hand it's uplifting to anyone whose values have ever been confronted - if you have ever wondered whether to defend your convictions, this film clearly shows it's worth it.

MASTERMINDS

Watchable. I wasn't laughing but quite enjoyed this silly comedy. It avoided "Hangover"-style vulgarity. Jason Sudeikis is as good as usual. Zach Galifaniakis has exceeded all his previous enactments. He's so convincingly happy-go-lucky and clumsy that the movie's worth seeing just for his sake.

THE ACCOUNTANT

Watchable. The accountant Chris Wolff says he likes incongruencies. I don't. And while I loved a bigger part of the film: Ben Affleck, still looking hot, his characted gifted wih Asperger syndrome, the financial conundrum, the shaping of the boy's character, swift combat scenes, Chris's blunt interactions, at some point the plot becomes so over the top it goes towards usual American cheese. The final: "How do I find you?" "I'll find you." exchange was so cliche I just knew I was going to hear it.

DOCTOR STRANGE IN 4DX

Watchable. A car crush and getting punches in 4DX - makes it terrifyingly real. Not a life I'd like. The city structure bending CGIs just bend your mind. I guess it would look even better at IMAX. The plot however is plain silly. As usual with Marvel, there is a Stan Lee's cameo and 2 after-the-credits scenes.

UKRAINA! FILM FESTIVAL

BRATY. OSTANNYA SPOVID (BROTHERS: THE FINAL CONFESSION) (2013)

Watchable. Grim and tragic - not surprisingly based on a Swedish novel. But it's Ukrainian so so it's terribly religious in addition. Not that the story is any less moving or hard-hitting - the film is made very well. It's just dark and heavy.

THE RUSSIAN WOODPECKER (2015)

Watchable. Just like in the case of Andrzej Fidyk's "Yodok Stories", when overt expression of political opinions is a threat to your freedom or even life, artistic performance is a way round. Fedor Alxeandrovich  is a thorough documentalist, not shy of obtaining data surreptitiously. He's got radioactive strontium in his bones and a history of political opposition in his family (his grandfather). While many see him as an oddball, in this crazy world of public lies, he's the most normal. Step by step, he discovers a disturbing possibility - that the Chernobyl tests resulting in the 1986 catastrophe, were a front to hide a communist careerist's mistake which otherwise might have cost him life. Soon it turns out Soviets never disappeared. The only minus of the film is that, as the result of being so artistic, it lacks suspense.


PODZIEMNE PANSTWO KOBIET (2009)

Recommended. A shocking documentary about the horrible conditions of terminating pregnancies in Poland. That means 80-200 thousand women a year suffering humiliation and additional distress just as a result of the ban. It also makes some gynaecologists rich like warlords - shall I dub them banlords?


UKRAINA! FILM FESTIVAL

MAIDAN.

Watchable. It follows the development of the protest. It's like a chronicle without taking sides or giving a deeper insights. Watching the winter protest reminded me of ACTA protests in Poland a few years ago. I wonder if Polish women will be protesting in snow and frost shortly.

UKRAINA! FILM FESTIVAL

TINI ZBUTYKH PREDKIV (SHADOWS OF FORGOTTEN ANCESTORS) (1965)

Walked out. Sort of folk musical with very bad music, shaky and rushed camerawork and no obvious plot. Looks archaic too.

UKRAINIAN SHERIFFS (2015)

Watchable. Oscar candidate?! Really? A documentary about a poor village where nearly everyone is an alcoholic and has served a term in prison. Culture-wise Ukraine is certainly close to Russia, taken the amount of alcohol consumed and taking ice dips in winter.

GNIZDO GORLYTSI (THE NEST OF THE TURTLEDOVE) (2016)

Watchable. Clear and thorough portrayal of Ukrainina immigration to Italy: its causes, effects on the emigrating women, their spouses and offspring. The film's very well made, it truly brings it all home. A minor weakness of the film is its not closing some subplots.

JACK REACHER: NEVER GO BACK

Watchable. Intelligent entertainment without depth. The scene from the trailer in which Jack Reacher says what "two things are going to happen in the next 90 seconds" is actually the first one. From then on a riddle follows a riddle and Reacher is always one step ahead. Or if he isn't, his presumed daughter is. The action doesn't relent for a minute so it's all good fun to watch. Apart from that it's a common recently mixture of sexism and feminism: (fighting) fit Cobie Smulders is shown partly undressed, in her push-up bra, for no reason and a bit later she has a rant about how guys tried to grope her in the army or how she's been constatnly asked to look after children and the like. Danika Yarosh is excellent as a streetwise 15 year old. Tom Cruise is visibly aged on his face and neck but in great shape - really pleasing to watch minus the close-ups.

CREATIVE CONTROL

Watchable. Why's a movie about the future black and white? Is it meant to be bleak?! Well, according to the film it's going to be all about sex and addictions: to drugs and to VR. "It's not what you think" takes on a new meaning. In augmented reality everyone becomes a product, you can cut up a voice record to have your private avatar say whatever you fancy hearing and you have virtual sex with the face of a real person combined with a porn star body. All screens are transparent and men's hairstyles and facial hair fashion resembles 70s porn actors. While I'm not fond of such a vision of the future, it's very likely to happen. In that sense it's quite realistic, not SF. The incurable characteristic of our civilization, present and future, is loneliness and search of love.

ADWOKAT W ROLI GLOWNEJ (ADVOCATE IN THE LEADING ROLE)

KOBIETY ADWOKATURY

Watchable. A documentary made, as far as I'm aware, by a lawyer. Very neat and organised. The presented female advocats just sit and talk. They stress the importance of their lawyer parents, their own devotion to the profession and their involvement in human rights cases.

BRIDGE OF SPIES (2015)

Recommended again. "Aren't you worried?" "Would it help?" is one of my fave lines, appearing three times in this film (I counted this time), it's also one of the most clever life lessons ever. Lots of other jokes, e.g.: "I wonder who they'll send to identify me." "Not your East German family I hope. I doubt they could identify each other." Tom Hanks and Mark Rylance in their top roles. And a very, very clever plot. I guess I could see it a couple more times still enjoying it.

I skipped "Chicago" which I had walked out from years ago as well as "A Few Good Men" and "Eric Brockovich" which I had seen a number of times and remembered all too well.

RUNAWAY JURY (2004)

Watchable. Chaotic at first but full of ingenious court tricks which look quite realistic, who knows, might come in handy. Kept me on the edge of my seat nevertheless. Simply the tension of which way the verdict would sway was enough. And there's a surprise towards the end. Likeable characters, some anyway.

AMISTAD (1998)

Watchable. One of the best closing statements ever tells about freedom being our natural state because it's when we lose it that we fight to get it back. Anthony Hopkins is marvellous: first a nebbish ex-president only to turn into a prominent barrister. Sadly no other actor is. It shows some interesting ways of finding an interpreter (counting to ten in the language going through a market) and of misperceiving certain behaviours across cultures. It's just that the actors seems to be random people with no skills and the story jumps to and fro. But if you sit through all the disarray, you get rewarded with a memorable speech by Anthony Hopkins as an attorney.

WITNESS FOR THE PROSECUTION (1957)

Watchable. Agatha Christie, on whose book it's based, liked dressing up her baddies and so is the case here. It is standard Agatha Christie: involving yet predictable. The true gem are the dialogues between the mischevious drunk/smart barrister and his maid, just like the ones between Miss Marple and hers and just to what lenghts he goes to hide his smoking and drinking - truly amusing.

ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS

Watchable. While I didn't laugh even once, I felt entertained throughout. Really light, colourful and de-braining. Let's hope DJ deadmau5 doesn't sue them over "DJ Dead Mice". Kate Moss looks like a mermaid in her glimmering green dress. The ending is great as it's a direct play on the final scene from "Some Like It Hot".

A MONSTER CALLS

Watchable. Tragic, sad and depressing, about a schoolboy's mum dying of cancer. And so slow-paced I slept through the middle. Says some sad truths about people.

PUTIN FOREVER?

Watchable. I'm not sure if it had to be 93 minutes long. The whole film is just home-based interviews with Russian opposition activists. You see how determined they are to end Putin's rule and how aware they are it's going to take years of demonstrations. Boris Nemtsov appears disarmingly gentle and kind. So the ending listing all of the portrayed activists either in voluntary exile or, Nemtsov, dead, is striking. Is Putin immovable? Good, jumpy Russian music. I couldn't resist the impression Poland may reach the stage at which Russia is now.

WSZYSTKIE NIEPRZESPANE NOCE (ALL THESE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS)

Watchable. Lots of techno and electro music (mostly Das Komplex and Lutto Lent). Partly filmed in 1500m2 and Bar Studio. Two guys: one hot, one not. On of them dances very well and a lot. Frustration shown in their constant smoking. All about music, drugs, looking for happiness and the fear of loneliness.

INFERNO

Watchable. A blockbuster following Hitchcock's rule that "A good film should start with an earthquake and be followed by rising tension." The beginning is confusing only to reflect Professor Langdon's muddled state of mind. Then regular action takes over with all the mandatory twists and turns, red herrings and solving the ideogramic puzzle. Florence, Venice, Istanbul feature with the accompaniment of Hans Zimmer's music giving the film a monumental feel. A good action movie following the genre rules.

AMERICAN HONEY

Watchable. According to Roman Gutek, what distinguishes American cinema is: the genre of western, the development of musical, science fiction and myths, not being a national cinema. This one tackles myths. 162 minutes you don't feel at all. While it re-works well-known motifs, it does so interestingly. I felt touched by the story from the scene indicating sexual abuse going on in Star's home. That was the moment I really took to her. She's very young, 18, and poor. The first city on her way is "Superman's City" (Kansas). The whole film is full of American symbols. The youngsters identify themselves with Darth Vader as the epitome of lost love and hopes. US stars and stripes are everywhere: in the girl's name, on a train passing by their road van, the company owner's swimsuit, make-up and nail polish colors. The motley crew from all over the US listen to rap and travel through the country "rhymin' & stealin'". The film also features a number of American ballads, all in some way referring to the American dream, just like what the sales team try to live. It's also about others trying to achieve it, like the abbatoir truck driver dreaming of his own yacht. But mostly it's about selling a dream - the team, often high on drugs or alcohol, try to push needless goods doing just that. The quintessence of America.

I went to the presentation of an upcoming Polish movie titled "Po prostu przyjazn" and it looked dull, with nothing funny in the trailer and, worst of all, it got compared to "Listy do M." ("Letters to Santa"), the first part of which I had walked out from. I'm still curious of the film as the subject of friendship is obviously something anyone can relate to. It's just that my hopes are low.

I thought that instead I could have fun asking actors about their taste in films as well as to get some lateral info I was curious of. My overall impression was that most actors found it difficult to speak without a script. Some got literally taken aback by the question. Magdalena Rozczka dubbed it "cruel" as, apart from work, house chores left her no time to watch anything. She'd love to see everything that's on at the cinema. Piotr Stramowski, looking even more of a hipster and arrogant than in the upcoming film, said "it wasn't like he felt he had to go to the cinema". He watches stuff but clearly it's not his passion. Agnieszka Wiedlocha's taste was the most eclectic ranging from Kusturica to the "Sex and the City" series which she could watch over and over as well as anything with Meryl Streep. Generally they seemed to fancy Polish full-length works, especially the latest two loud productions: "Ostatnia rodzina" and "Wolyn", both usually seen at the Gdynia Film Festival and American series, obviously including "Breaking Bad", in one case even "Stranger Things" (Aleksandra Domanska), but never anything as extreme as "The Walking Dead" or even megapopular "The Game of Thrones" . Aleksandra Domanska was the chattiest and provided me with a long list of her faves from classics like late Wajda's "Ziemia obiecana", "Czlowiek z marmuru" or "Czlowiek z zelaza", non-late-Wajda's "Przesluchanie" and "Casablanca", through anything with Meryl Streep to "masculine" movies by Tarantino, rather older plus "Inglourious Basterds" as well as lots of series, including: "you certainly won't know this one - "Gilmore Girls". Kamil Kula, who only doesn't like watching himself, hasn't yet found the time to see "Ostatnia rodzina" and "Wolyn" but was going to. As Maciej Zakoscielny, the most non-verbally expressive of the crowd, had just recommended both to me, especially "Wolyn" which had "shaken" him, I enquired if Kamil Kula followed his colleagues recommendation. Certainly not, he looked at me astonished. Maciej Zakoscielny's taste was the closest to mine - he was the only one to have enjoyed " The Neon Demon" and, as he was dubbing Eddie Redmayne, he's got the chance to see "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them". The youngest of the actors, 10-year-old Adam Tomaszewski, has always had dramatic parts but when watching prefers comedy shows, especially "Mr. Bean". While the oldest one - Bartlomiej Topa, who rarely finds time to watch anything but would love to see more - liked "The House of Cards". No one else did.

The lateral info I got was:

• The current season of "Singielka" was shot in spring and, to Kamil Kula's knowledge, is the last one. The serial won't be continued.
• Adam Tomaszewski has been acting since he was 3 and his parents had brought him to an agency just because they had been repeatedly told their son had been "lovely like in a commercial". He's appeared in commercials, films, a serial and theatre. He was the blind man's partner's son in "Carte Blanche" as well as a drug dealer in "Skazane". He finds theatre the hardest as he can't make any mistake. His the oldest child and he's got two younger sisters. The middle one - Oliwia - has had a small role once too but felt shy, got stressed out and refused to do it ever again. The youngest one, now 3, is in the agency too but so far has been deemed either too young or too old for the offered parts.
• I asked Bartlomiej Topa about his role I hadn't liked in "Karbala". I had found a clash between his commander's position and his giving orders with a trembling voice. The actor explained to me his perception of the character: "he went there to build water pipelines and give away sweets", he didn't need to be tough, "where he was he could have whispered orders and would have been obeyed".

Between 20-23 October the Iluzjon cinema in Warsaw will be hosting UKRAINA! - a Ukrainian Film  Festival which I'm going to.

Shortly afterwards the 7th American Film Festival takes place in Wroclaw. While I'm not going there, I just have to remark on its logotype which looks blurred like a 3D picture seen without 3D glasses. Poor print or poor graphics?

After both festivals, in early November the Muranow cinema will finally open the 2 new screens. They're going to have 40 seats each and show niche movies which normally disappear from cinemas too soon.

JESTEM MORDERCA

Watchable. Perfectly recreated 70s in communist Poland: pervasive smoking, drinking, 70s fashion, interiors. Lots of humour, e.g. the first computer. Agata Kulesza unrecognizable in her fat costume. The action takes place in Silesia and several actors speak with Silesian accent - just enough to demonstrate where it's based but soft enough to be comprehensible to the rest of Poles (I can't fully understand my original Silesian friend and I had no problems with the film). The movie's very well scripted psychologically, extremely well acted, costumed, made up and set up. I only found it frustrating not to find out the truth. In that manner the film is too true to real life - no one knows. It would have hit harder if it had taken sides.

I, DANIEL BLAKE

Watchable. Austere, at a steady pace, yet deeply moving. Sad and depressing but so hard-hitting it's hard to shake off. Showing the very bottom of British society - decent, honest people struggling to survive on benefits. Set in Newcastle so spoken mostly in geordie, partly in London accent too, due to one of protagonists. Very realistic. It's just that if you've ever been through the catch 22 of British red tape in any manner, it's a bit frustrating to watch it on the screen.

WOLYN (HATRED)

Watchable. 149 minute long with lots of sidetracking which means I dozed off a few times and, while some sense eventually emerged from the chaos, it's not easy to follow. Story-wise, I mean. Because there are also a number of truly gruesome scenes, due to the subject matter. Like the director and the distributor rightly noticed, the film may be incomprehensible to Westerners. It wasn't 100% understandable to me, either. Part of it lies in the confusion between two languages: both Polish and Ukrainian sound similar. Another thing is that British or American films have one storyline, while Polish ones, annoyingly, stray from the main plot every now and then, trying to put all different vaguely associated bits and pieces into one movie. While both reasons sound true, for me it's also my poor knowledge of Polish history.

MISS PEREGRINE'S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN

Watchable. The story's nothing like what I've seen before. It contains my perennial favourites: time loops, fantastic geography overlapping the real world map, mutants. Miss Peregrine is brilliant: beautiful, sassy, very smart, a perfectionist. It's very well acted by everyone. The created world is peculiar indeed and doesn't steal other authors' ideas. However, it sounds childish, at least in the Polish dubbing and lacks humour. Decent 3D.

I also went to a meeting with one of my fave directors, Jan Jakub Kolski, today and have to say that a person's film-making skills don't have to match their speaking skills. The creator of fascinating films sounded boring.

THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN

Watchable. I haven't read the book but have seen the movie trailer so many times I probably know it by heart now. The film itself is not a thriller but a psychological drama so that was a slight disappointment. That plus pervasive obsession with having a baby as if all three women had their lives centred about the issue. Strange a woman (Paula Hawkins) wrote a book so sexist. The finale is quite predictable too. But no worries, you don't pay so much attention to it while watching. The structure is clear yet involving, with enough mystery to keep you on the edge of the seat throughout. It's very convincingly enacted, with Haley Bennett (the beauty from "Hardcore Henry") in one of the leading roles. 3 women, 3 men (plus 1 woman and 1 man from the train) form a twisted story of crime, obsession, addiction, seduction, deceit and psychological violence.

NIE PLACZ KIEDY ODJADE (DON'T CRY WHEN I'M GONE)

Watchable. Made me cry and made me laugh a good few times. A documentary about a woman who survived the Holocaust only to find her whole family annihilated and about the rest of her life being full of joy. She wrote some popular songs, including the eponymous one and was greatly skilled in flirting with men. Both form the basis of the jokes told in the film: e.g. once a friend told her he had seen her song on the back of a bus ("Don't cry when I'm gone"), another time she was lying in hospital bed and when her visiting friends were leaving, one said: "Hang in there." to which she responded: "I'd rather let myself loose." The structure of the movie has some room for improvement. It's a bit chaotic and ends all of a sudden. But these are minor detractions from a very enjoyable film.

BACALAUREAT (GRADUATION)

Watchable. About pervasive corruption rooted in Romanian culture and difficult relationships. Its complicated story is very involving in spite of mediocre acting. The policemen are particularly poorly portrayed.


DOMACI PECE (HOME CARE)

Watchable. A comedy about being terminally ill with some truly funny bits, e.g.: "It's skin tuberculosis. Looks just like on the internet." or one with a phone falling into an open grave. So it gets sad at times but makes you laugh every now and then. Good actors in the leading roles, worse support roles and extras.

WESTWORLD - EPISODE 1

Watchable. My first impressions: needless nudity, pointless violence, a run-of-the-mill film gave way to a bewilderment at the science fiction layer soon revealed yet didn't disappear completely. The SF layer is intriguing indeed: the androids through reveries tap into long lost memories and, as their creator says, long lost memories alter us, evolution is a result of mistakes and we come to this world as an effect of an illusion. Great music, views of Wild West landscapes, the hosts are remarkably well acted and I guess it's not easy to enact numerous personality changes over less than a minute. Calling the Westworld androids hosts reminds me of "The Host" by Stephanie Meyer - here they're benevolent as well, however it's them being used by humans, not the other way round. Poor translation into Polish (e.g. reveries, core to the plot, don't get translated at all).


DEEPWATER HORIZON

Watchable. Based on facts which I generally like. Starts in a horror style where the protagonists' day-to-day lives are marred by ominous signs. Later, however, the film goes along glory-to-the-heroes lines. Lots of wooden dialogues.

ZTRACENI V MNICHOVE

Walked out. First it's a peculiar story based around an incident from Czech history, made in a comic way which fails to be funny. Later suddenly you're informed it's happening in a movie and then you get plenty of interviews with the makers on shooting the film. The actual creators of this film clearly had no clue how to make it.

DON'T BREATHE

Watchable. It's a slasher movie where a worn-out scenario gets a new twist: the slasher is blind and the vics are burglers. Seems like girls kept in the basement have become a norm in Hollywood, probably following the Cleveland capture case, here the new capture scene is a bit of novelty in terms of what and how is done to the vic. In spite of the cat and mouse game becoming boring at times, it's a real nail-biter of a film, well acted, with an exquisite initial scene and a good ending leaving the door open for a sequel.

THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN 4D

Watchable. 4D here means 2D visuals + all sorts of shakes and blasts of cold air. No scents this time. The movements put you in a horse saddle, in the middle of a brawl or a shootout which is extra fun. The film itself is just fine. The makers seem to have had a problem deciding whether it should mimick the old version or be modern so they have mixed old-fashioned language and chauvinism with present-style multiculturalism and multilinguism and the eponymous seven are all macho men each of a different ethnic background. The seven get such a long exposure each that you get to like them all. Faraday's (Chris Pratt) smirk pervades the movie. However their conversations aren't particularly involving, their heroism is far-fetched and the story's typical for a western (apart from the fact it's a multiple remake).

Careful with popcorn or Coke in a 4D screen! Easier to spill than anywhere else.

Warsaw's Cinema City in Arkadia is harder to access now. You have to go round the shopping center to get the escalator to the first floor. So it's 5 minutes extra that you need before the movie.

THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN

I've seen it already and will draft a review in a minute. Due to a publishing ban however I will post it as late as on 4th October. Keep your eyes peeled!

NIGHT FILM MARATHON - NOC HORROROW (THE NIGHT OF HORRORS)

I skipped "Blair Witch" and "Sinister 2" which I had seen already and chose to see only:

THE HALLOW

Walked out. Black slime, scratches on a window and the car and corpse-like monsters amid baby screaming. All of that shown early on. And with an environmental/political message (in a horror!). Rubbish.

MY SOUL TO TAKE

Walked out. A slasher movie about a bunch of teenagers who are so stupid you just want them all to be killed.

BLAIR WITCH

Watchable. I never managed to see "The Blair Witch Project" in one piece. It was so boring I walked out from the screening at first and caught up with the very ending on TV years later. The new version faster-paced and hosts attractive James Allen McCune in the leading role which makes the wait for the ending more bearable. Scary it isn't. More of an adventure film where high tech devices cause more problems than they solve.

SLUGI BOZE

Watchable. Very good crime mystery with some brilliant lines, e.g. "Nie jestes feministka?" "Jesli pytasz o to, czy sypiam z komisarzem, to juz nie." ("You're not a feminist, are you?" "If you're asking if I sleep with the officer - not any more.") and lots of twists and turns of action. A bit too many set-ups but played interestingly. Each character is a fascinating distinct personality. Some loops don't close though, e.g. what about Ana's father? What with the property case? The "Silesian" doesn't speak with Silesian accent and her family roots are too twisted to stand. I must add I loved the plane scene at the ending.

ALOYS

Watchable. In a dream-like world times mix. Aloys lives like a few decades ago but has got a modern smartphone. The story however is on the margin of SF. It's rather trying to face the discrepancy between your real partner and an imagined one. The film's dull yet atmospheric in an old-fashioned way.

OTOTO (ABOUT HER BROTHER)

Watchable. A warm tale about family and friends. Lots of real life issues so it works like catharsis. Slow pace. Nothing deep.

HEART OF A DOG

Watchable. The film's weird and structure chaotic. It's also more of a slide show with a commentary than a movie. Some fragments are disturbingly odd, e.g. director Laurie Anderson's enaction of giving birth to a dog. Other are touching like her, even if peculiar, love for dogs. There's also a deeply emotional notion of how "you really don't want to lie to somebody who's dying" and of how she had no time to tell her mum she cared for for. It's also partly about how people try to preserve their acts and memories. So the film's a complete mess with some importaint issues acknowledged. The topic makes the film more suitable for All Saints' Day rather.

The refurbishment in progress at Warsaw's Muranow cinema has taken a funny turn: the cinema is totally gender-equall at present - with urinals in the ladies' loo.

PROSTA HISTORIA O MORDERSTWIE

Watchable. Barely. Camerawork incongruent with the pace of the story. Chaotic editing. Filip Plawiak i Mateusz Wieclawek are very good, shame their acting skills get wasted on such a film.

THE CHILDHOOD OF A LEADER

Watchable. Starts and ends with thunderous music adding meaning to otherwise innocent scenes, especially to the initial one. That somehow fierce music stands out. Robert Pattinson is not-so-readily recognisable in one of roles - not just his looks but his accent and manner of speaking. The film develops slowly and feels  drowsy at times. I only don't understand how the depicted child - future leader - is different from all other children: throwing tantrums, obstinate, incontrolable.

THE LIGHT BETWEEN OCEANS

Watchable. It starts cheesy and flat - the relationship develops without evoking any emotions in the viewer (or me at least). Later it becomes so deeply moving that you forget all the cheese. Tissues should be sold together with tickets - can't do without them. Alicia Vikander and Michael Fassbender act up to the scratch as usual.

MORGAN

Watchable. Yet another female assassin movie, this one by Ridley Scott's son Luke. And with run-of-the-mill motifs: a superhuman girl living  closed in a room with a glass wall, developing mentally and physically at a speedy rate etc. While the general storyline is predictable, who kills who and when is less so which results in some tension efficiently gluing you to the screen. With some superficial questions about what makes a creature human. More emotions equals less control. Too much gets revealed too early in the movie hence there's little mystery left. The final scene implies a sequel. However lousy it sounds, it's well made. Typically skilled Hollywood artisanship. The psychological assessment scene in the Luke Scott's film is a clear reference to a similar evaluation in Ridley Scott's "Blade Runner" but that one was much more subtle and ambiguous. Luke needs to find his own way, following his father's steps hasn't worked.

OSTATNIA RODZINA (THE LAST FAMILY)

Watchable. It's very Polish and about quite particular personalities: the Beksinskis. So if you're not familiar with the topics, it may be quite hard. The realities of those times (from 1983 to 2000) are painstakingly rebuilt through scenography although... I remember the 80s as very colourful, not dark in hues of brown like in the film. Dawid Ogrodnik looks and speaks just like Tomek Beksinski. There's a brief footage of "vampire" Wojciech Jagielski interviewing Tomek. The dialogues are filled with absurd humour which somehow isn't amusing in the depressing movie. The whole thing is grim but enlivened with brilliant music: "Don't Go" by Yazoo and "Dancing With Tears In My Eyes" by Ultravox.

BRIDGET JONES'S BABY

Watchable. Funny to see it shortly after my 43rd birthday. I can only hope I won't get knocked up! It's very funny, e.g. a guy trying to unfasten Bridget's dress: "How, the hell, am I going to get into this?!" or about two men who where telling her to "think the pain" away during labour: "You have an entire human being to push out of your vagina. I'd love to see them think that away." At the same time the film's very PC and with a tacky ending.

LES SAISONS (SEASONS)

Watchable. A nature quasi-documentary (with some history features here and there which detracts from the pleasure of watching a nature film). Some shots are beautiful, yet the whole thing is chaotic, looks like edited at random. The last half an hour is very sad. I was crying like a baby.

NERVE

Recommended. A fantastic adrenaline ride. My palms got really sweaty at the hanging scene. Very good, matching music and creative credits. Dave Franco looks/acts really hot in this film.

MAGGIE'S PLAN

Watchable. The story of an adult triangle plus 3 kids is involving by its nature but is neither innovative nor funny. One interesting statement comes from a TV interview with one of the characters: "No one has ever foreseen a revolution until its third day."

HANDS OF STONE

Watchable. Very good in whole but flawed. The director of  superb "Secuestro Express" says that "90% of movies are too long and too slow." Unfortunately his latest feels a bit protracted at times too. It's quite a schematic boxing movie yet involving, well acted, with a story and some political (Panama-US relations) subplot. Robert de Niro as Ray Arcel, who he had actually worked with on "Raging Bull", R&B musician Usher as Sugar Ray Leonard, who partially trained him, a cameo of Felicidad Duran as a nurse, Ana de Armas as Felicidad Duran acting a rich guy's girlfriend/wife again (after "War Dogs"). Based on facts.

LO AND BEHOLD: REVERIES OF THE CONNECTED WORLD

Recommended. Some little known facts: If you created a paper directory of email account holders, the list would be 73 miles/120 km thick. The 2050 FIFA World Championships are likely to be won by a robot team, with one of the robots being actually better than others, just like it is with human players. Stanford University results show that its Open University had 412 best students, only the 413rd was actually studying there. It was possible, luckily never enacted, for a hacker to whistle a signal on the phone to fire missiles in the 90s. Mitnick was able to follow calls (without actual conversations but who called who and from where) of FBI agents who followed him ad stacked his fridge with "donuts for the FBI". These and several other contemporary stories about the internet. Informative and fun.

MECHANIC: RESURRECTION

Watchable. The action takes you from Brazil (Rio) to Thailand , Australia (Sydney), Bulgaria (Varna) and Cambodia. Jason Statham, Jessica Alba nd Tommy Lee Jones ensure it's all good fun. However, the action goes from point A to point B (C etc.) with no surprises and the dialogues are all like: "Let's go! We have 3 minutes before it blows."

CZERWONY KAPITAN (THE RED CAPTAIN)

Recommended. It's quite dark and heavy but consistent with the grim story. It is quite brutal too but with very good dialogues lightening up the atmosphere, e.g. the police to a priest: "Wiedzielibysmy wiecej, gdyby sie Pan wyspowiadal." ("We'd know more if you confessed.") or "Bog nas stworzyl ateistami." ("God created us as atheists."). Very good music. Gripping. Kept me on the edge of my seat.

MR. RIGHT

Watchable. Exquisite Anna Kendrick as Martha. Sam Rockwell as Mr. Right isn't sexy but is fun and fit for a killer. Tim Roth is a poor killer here, rather an old prick. The whole thing is silly but good fun.

DOM (a short animation shown together with "Je Me Tue A Le Dire")

Watchable. About a dysfunctional family. The eponymous home is bereft of meaning. All the family members talk about is food, drink and cleaning. You just feel how relieved the girl must to leave. It's all very realistic in several shades of grey and a bit of brown (for the tea and the dog).

JE ME TUE A LE DIRE (DEATH BY DEATH)

Watchable. Have all Belgians decided to specialise in weird comedies, black and white in that? The main protagonist is fat, hairy, ugly. His mother looks little better. So not much of a visual pleasure here. Good music, matching the weirdness of the movie which is predominantly about breasts. Breasts here can either feed or fall ill and it's the guy's main obsession. I found one scene funny: the guy is pissing against a gate when it starts sliding open.

BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE ULTIMATE EDITION

Watchable. 181 minutes pass hardly noticeably. To my astonishment I liked the extended version better. The extra scenes blend smoothly into the storyline, assisted by superb film music. I watched it at a regular cinema this time and I found it much easier to focus on the plot than at Imax. There's no action overload. Tension, gentle wit, nostalgy, sorrow and solemnity mix at an uneven pace which prevents boredom. Ben Affleck is my favourite Batman ever. There are tongue-in-cheek references to the series of Jokers from previous movies and to the Arkham Asylum and intriguing ones to X-Men (the final scene) and Avengers as well as a sequel promise. No after-the-credits scene however. The few things I found a bit annoying are: murmuring Jeremy Irons replacing superb Michael Caine as Bruce Wayne's butler and Holly Hunter mumbling as if she couldn't move her face muscles properly.

IL TRADUTTORE

Watchable. Experiences most viewers can refer to make for involving watching, acting could be better though and pace a bit faster. Meglio un uovo oggi che una gallina domani (literally translated: better an egg today than a hen tomorrow) or so at least do the men in the film think having their foreign love affairs. Yet emotions get involved. Is Andrei unfaithful only to his girlfriend or to himself as well? This part is quite straightforward. However, there's another set of stories in the film as well. A young student is gaining professional experience and the first assignments are full of traps. Whether out of sympathy or for his own advantage he veers off professionalism. People get hurt. So does he.

L'AVENIR

Watchable. A fictitious story very true to life. Nathalie has a life filled with little joys (mildly amusing to the viewer) and little problems. She's constantly busy with her work and family. Then, within a short period of time, she loses most of it. What will she do about it? Well, the example of her inherited cat shows that when suddenly let free you follow your natural instincts. An ordinary, yet thought-provoking story. The woman is a philosophy teacher so you'll find philosophers mentioned or quoted here and there throughout the film, luckily for down-to-earth me those abstract statements are just zest, not the essence. The music is annoying at times.

WAR DOGS

Recommended. It's like "The Wolf of Wall Street" but funnier ("How was the funeral?" "It was amazing!" is one example). First class actors including Jonah Hill known from the above mentioned movie. The story's based on true events, superbly scripted and directed by Todd Phillips (who would expect after his earlier class B "Hangover" or "Borat?), with great locations shots and music going in smoothly. The film, contrary to the book ("Arms and the Dudes" by Guy Lawson) is set chronologically so it's easy to follow the tensions between the people, their way of doing business and the changes, or the lack of thereof, in their company and lifestyles. Only two of the original three gunrunners are portrayed with no detraction from the fun or the story itself.

 

BEN HUR 3D

Watchable. Decent 3D. The story's all predictable and playing on cheap sentiments. Only the chariot race scene kept me on the edge of my seat and it's best to leave right after. The ending is so much cheese you're going to choke on it.

NIGHT FILM MARATHON - NOC JOKEROW (THE NIGHT OF JOKERS)

SUICIDE SQUAD

Recommended. The rubbish trailer wasn't quite inviting but the movie's quite a ride. Marvelous CGIs (pun intended), fun soundtrack of a wide scope of artists (Kanye West, Rolling Stones, Eminem, Black Sabbath etc.). Punk-like Joker by Jared Leto who perfected tormented heroes already in his debut "Requiem for a Dream". The Joker's girlfriend Harley Quinn, by smoking hot Margot Robbie, is a sassy acrobat reminiscent of Pris from "Blade Runner". She also utters the best lines, like the one about metahumans being unable to live regular lives. Enchantress resembles the phantom from "Grudge", at least before her two metamorphoses. Amanda Waller must have been inspired by Condoleezza Rice in her looks, position and stance. The Joker and Harley Quinn steal the show. Their love affair made me remember all the real life women falling for death row convicts. Don't miss the much revealing sequel-announcing scene after the first end credits!

THE DARK KNIGHT

Watchable. A smart script but some scenes protracted or needless. On the other hand a handful shocked me. Here we get a scruffy Joker by memorable superb Heath Ledger: a combination of madman gestures with a psychopath mind. The main topic of the film is chaos versus plan: how you see the world and how you perceive people's reactions to unusual events determines how you act - so, do you plan?

BATMAN (1989)

Watchable. The worst film of the night. Only interesting for comparison reasons. The Joker here is grotesque in his old-fashioned-cut purple suit. The film looks like SF from the 60s - artificial, forced and conventional.

Uncomfortable seats in the Zlote Tarasy Multikino screen 1, especially the new ones in the middle. And annother delay from the beginning of the marathon. They should have been letting people in through both entrances right away.

LES NOUVELLES AVENTURES D'ALADIN (THE NEW ADVENTURES OF ALADDIN)

Watchable. No doubt meant to repeat the success of "Astérix & Obélix: Mission Cléopâtre" ("Asterix & Obelix: Mission Cleopatra") but less funny, hard to say if it's because of Polish dubbing sounding artificial or because it's too obscene at times. One thing's sure: it's not for young children - they won't get it - from teenagers upwards. Some scenes are funny, like the one when Aladin lands on top of a roof just next to the spire, several are meant to be. The dialogues contain plenty of references to country (Poland in the version I saw but certainly individualised in each country) politics, music, comedy shows, literature, world politics, blockbusters, commercials, Internet, even Warsaw (in this case) topography. It's all full of colours, the princess' costumes based on bellydance. The music's just fine - I don't like rap. The main protagonists are shopping centre Santas so it may be better to watch the film around Christmas.

MIKE AND DAVE NEED WEDDING DATES

Watchable. As one of the girls in the movie says: "girls can do shit, too" and this is what the film's about. The humour is of "you may experience after-shock orgasms" sort. Not as gross as "American Pie" but just as dumb. One scene of interest is the quad ride through the "Jurassic Park" location.

HELL OR HIGH WATER

My No. 1 readers (number-wise) are American so I was happy to hear of the US release in just two days' time (it's coming out as late as September in Poland). So you're getting my review just in time, in spite of being a continent apart.

Recommended. In a quiet, dusty Texan town a woman in a floral dress is going to work. The clean white of the fabric with blue flowers contrasts with the drabness of her surroundings. What looks like a lazy summer afternoon somewhere, is the start of an unusually busy morning in the middle of nowhere. The script is little short of perfection. The criminal scheme, the policemen's banter, the landscapes and the tough folk who inhabit them create a contemporary western. Everyone's seriously tough here, including women, e.g. a waitress: "Steaks cooked medium-rare" "Can I just have...?" "It wasn't a question." Great acting too. My fave Chris Pine's best role ever: from subtle facial expressions to a shaking hand covering a wound. If it were up to me, he'd get an Oscar. In fact he just acts so well you nearly forget about his blue eyes.

NINE LIVES

Recommended. What will send a cat flying across the room? And what will send the owner? When you see a guy in a stylish suit in a flash car in a film you know he's no family guy. The reality is often different from what I can tell about the richest people I've met. Yet here he's a ruthless businessman. This is also where your perfect family film begins. Gentle humour and bright remarks like: "So what? Will he divorce you more?" turn into a hilarious comedy once the guy changes into a... cat.  The cat "could do with a (computer) mouse" to send a message and doesn't like tinned cat food: "I think somebody's eaten it once already." And that's just a small portion of lines and gags that still make me giggle hours later. Very good Polish dubbing this time, too.

PETE'S DRAGON

Watchable. An awfully sad beginning - it needn't have started so miserable, the boy could have just got lost - and very dark cinematography get compensated for with the dragon acting like a dog, some humour, e.g. "Mom, there's a monster behind the window" and the subsequent mum's reaction or "We're chasing a dragon" "Man, don't ridicule us on the radio!" as well as impressive vistas of the vast Tokoroa Forest, Northern Island, New Zealand. Robert Redford and Karl Urban have created the most distinct parts, Wes Bentley looks like a bad guy while not being the worst villain, Bryce Dallas Howard is sugary sweet to the point of nausea.

Judging from the trailer, DOCTOR STRANGE is going to have good 3D but awful voices cast for the Polish dubbing, sounding like in children's movies.

BARBIE: STAR LIGHT ADVENTURE

Watchable. A colourful, yet silly story. Clearly inspired by: "Star Wars", "Jupiter Ascending", Pokemons, "Back to the Future", "Avatar", "Guardians of the Galaxy", "Hunger Games" and some lesser known productions. Lovely with the rings of Saturn in the skyline of Barbie's home planet.

Cinemas should start offering child-free screenings of "children's movies" to the adults who want to see cartoons and the like in peace. It's just talking or screams audible from each direction. Plus some kids get brought in prams - will they understand a film? Really?! Selfish adults who don't know how to entertain their own kids just ruin the cinema experience for others.

TURK PASAPORTU (TURKISH PASSPORT)

Recommended. A little known story of how diplomats' professional and moral duty combined with Turkish efficiency led to saving lives of a few hundred Jews during the Nazi occupation of France. Moving and thought-provoking in the part about how stigmatisation and gradual limitation of rights prepared groud for extermination camps.

NOKTA (DOT) (2008)

Watchable. Chaotic so badly it took me half a film to get a grasp on who's who and who's done what. At the same time remarkably well acted. A simple story showing the ambivalence of human nature.

BAD MOMS

Watchable. "Bad Moms" aren't bad. Great music (lots of songs including ones by DNCE, Foreigner, David Guetta, Flo Rida but also a piece by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart can be found at http://www.soundtrackmania.net/bad-moms-soundtrack.html), the whole film feels like a party (movied-move-it). Some of the songs are actually called "Shut Up and Dance", "Runnin' Wild", "City Rock" or "Let's Have a Party" and a few scenes are shot in a video clip mode. Humour, party-style, ranges from silly and vulgar ("dick" is probably the most often used noun here), "She threatened me she would bang my husband." being on the decent side, to quite funny like Amy's (Mila Kunis) kissing attempt. In fact the whole movie's in a jest - I was smiling throughout. That's a good thing as the story's about people who cannot quite cope with their parental responsibilities and whenever they mean good it turns out bad. The mum of two who watched the film together with me said being a mum was just like that minus getting drunk when you get fed up with your motherhood. I, in turn, left the cinema smug to be childless.

아가씨 (THE HANDMAIDEN)

Recommended. 145 minute long with no second redundant. The story's tense and intense and a few surprises await. Made by Park Chan-wook of "Oldboy" fame, it contains just one brutal scene, well, physically brutal anyway. Telling stories plays a bigger part and puts the viewer in the same position as the gentlemen seeking unwholesome excitement under the guise of high culture. Music, cinematography, masterfully rationed nudity attract the eye and the ear. Heavy ending. The soft song over the credits doesn't soften the film - just the opposite: the sharp contrast only strengthens it.

ICE AGE: COLLISION COURSE 3D

Watchable. Great animation with very good 3D. Water glistens, meteorites shines and the animals have toy-like furs. What's annoying is the dialogues which sound like drunk teens' who are too cool for school. It's chaotic too.

1 minute past midnight Polish time. Here comes the promised review of

JASON BOURNE

Watchable. While it's far from poor, it's the weakest of the Bourne franchise. Not only does the film copy standard solutions from the series but also from other movies, e.g. Jason takes part in fights for a living like Wolverine. What's worse, he's clearly put on weight and his muscles are covered in fat. Two chase scenes are just too long. At the same time it's a sensible follow-up to the previous installments. Even Bourne's kills get summed up (32). The film refers to contemporary events, e.g. Syntagma Square protests in Athens, which brings the action home. Deep Dream is a swift reference to social media surveillance. Vincent Cassel is superb as a vicious agent, so is Alicia Vikander in the ambiguity of her character. Clear-cut structure lets you follow the film easily. Some major deaths change the scene. Intelligent and humorous ending promises a sequel. Very good music by Moby extends over credits. Fun guaranteed.

JULIETA

Recommended. A simple but emotional story. About how you're unable to understand what you haven't been through yourself. The film is sad but it's a beautiful depiction of a wide variety of relationships between people.

FINDING DORY

Watchable when seen for the second time. I enjoyed the beautiful pictures, colours and jokes (excellent translation into Polish) again. I hope the after-the-credits scene announces the third installment. It's such a beautiful series and I'd love to find out more, e.g. about the octopus's unpleasant ocean experiences.

STAR TREK BEYOND 3D

Watchable. Great 3D scenography disguises a flat film. It's a compilation of elements from other space opera movies: rocky or wooded planets, a "Federation" and swooshing weapons like in "Star Wars", a female alien guide introducing a male hero to her planet and calling Scott "Montgomery Scotty" resembles Jake Sully's Na'vi guide in "Avatar", even the "save yourselves" line from "Event Horizon" gets recycled when an enemy tells the Enterprise crew he wants to save them from themselves. In the previous Star Trek film cultural differences were the pivot, here they're virtually non-existent while various language dialects are prominent. Even though comedian Simon Pegg co-wrote the script, he wrote no funny scene or line even for himself. Lousy costumes - aliens' heads looking like rubber. The whole thing is pure action with no depth just like in director Justin Lin's earlier "Fast & Furious" films. He should steer clear of SF.


THE NEON DEMON

Recommended. It's nothing like what I've seen before. A few taboos are broken - be warned! Graphic scenes accompany stunning visuals and hypnotic music in this dark tale full of surprises and pushing the limits. Calling it pure evil full of glam would be excessively superficial even if correct, too.

CAFE SOCIETY

Watchable. It's about how people delude themselves. I remember hearing from Piotr Tymochowicz that, when he talked to several murderer's mothers, they always believed their sons were "such good boys" deep in heart. Of course Woody Allen is about sharp observation and humour. So here we get a family believing their relative is a businessman, not a gangster. We've also got two people deluding themselves they're not in love. It's still Allen but long past his best productions and while it's full of wit, it's not laugh-out-loud funny. Just an ordinary rom-com.

TUMBLEDOWN

Watchable. The dog scenes, though far and few between, are the highlights. American smalltown lifestyle may be another attraction. Other than that it's a very morose (no rom-com here, in spite of Jason Sudeikis) story of love and mourning. And hardly plausible in that as nothing brings the two together for the whole movie and then suddenly they've fallen for each other?!The film's about a musician but the soundtrack is just so-so. It's inspirated by a true story but, sadly, not all true stories are worth a film. And certainly not when it's the scriptwriter's own story. The worst literature I've read always resulted from the writer's broken or mended heart. Film scripts are no exception here.

KOBIETY BEZ WSTYDU

Watchable. Advertised as a rom-com it's far from that. I laughed only twice. The women are beautiful but the story is silly and sexist, it's similar to "Och, Karol" but much less amusing. In the middle the story diverts towards crime. The gangster oil tycoon looks like Jan Kulczyk - Poland's late richest man. I wonder how his family is going to react.

JASON BOURNE

I've just seen it and would love to share my impressions. Unfortunately, due to a publishing ban, the review will appear on 27th July. I'll try to post it right after midnight though.

THE SHALLOWS

Watchable. A stunning beach off Gold Coast, Queensland, Australia imitates Mexico. Suitable, modern music - not the "Jaws" theme. I expected that "Jaws of the new generation", as the film's advertised, would be environmentally friendly or something, without killing the shark. The biggest change however is the lack of chauvinism. No sexist remarks towards the girl and she's educated, smart and tough. Modern CGIs make the shark look realistic, you can see even his gulls moving, and the whole ecosystem is shown. The carcass and crab-eating remind me of certain movie and make me wonder if the actress (Blake Lively) stands an Oscar chance. She well deserves it for sure. There's one movie-related pun - listen carefully! Spanish dialogues don't get translated which adds to the realism. The whole thing is the definition of suspense. What detracts from this perfection is excessive eye make-up (as for water conditions), the fact she always sees clearly even in salty sea water and just after emerging to the surface and a flare lighting up water surface. The rest could be justified. But these few details just ruin the impression of realism.