Movie reviews

HALLOWEEN MARATHON AT CINEMA CITY

There were several different Halloween movie marathons all over the city. I picked one of various selections offered by Cinema City for the first night. The staff were all in costumes and the cinema decor included a fluffy black spider, pumpkins and skulls. The 3 movies were:

TWIN PEAKS: FIRE WALK WITH ME (1992)

Recommended. Acting David Lynch himself, with a cameo by David Bowie. Sheryl Lee acted as teenage Laura Palmer at the age of 25 and you can see that but it makes sense due to the number of erotic scenes. Very good music. An oniric feeling permeats the whole film. It just has a unique atmosphere.

The weirdest thing was to me seeing several teenagers walking out and coming back in and hearing their comments afterwards. I first saw bits of "Twin Peaks" when I was their age and for my generation it was a cult series. For today's teens it's not. What happened in between the generations that they don't get this style? Looks like Lynch won't have such cult following any more.

IT FOLLOWS (2014)

Recommended again. Very good music. I didn't find it scary at all this time but the unusual plot totally immersed me.

DON'T KNOCK TWICE (2016)

Walked out. The Polish "Baba Jaga" title attempts to bring it culturally closer to the Slavic people but fails miserably. The original "Don't Knock Twice" computer game is much closer to the movie. There's no gingerbread hut most importantly! Whatever the title is, however, it wouldn't save the movie no matter what. It's just total rubbish: no atmosphere or suspense, the scares appear too early and are shoddily made.


LUX FILM DAYS

120 BATTEMENTS PAR MINUTE (120 BEATS PER MINUTE)

Walked out. They debate, throw fake blood, debate, hurl blood again and discuss AIDS all the time, even during sex.

I evacuated myself to Cinema City.

THE MOUNTAIN BETWEEN US

Watchable. Far-fetched, cheesy and mawkish but psychologically plausible and once the plane crashes - in a silly way - you want to know how they make it, don't you?


NIGHT FILM MARATHON - NIGHT OF HORROR

I went for just one movie I hadn't seen before and which had no general release:

DEAD AWAKE

Walked out. I left due to a technical glitch but I feel no need to see the rest. The tech problem actually spared me watching this rubbish. The premise is very similar to "Slumber". Predictable as hell. Have all horror directors got the same script?!


HAPPY FAMILY

Watchable. Overlong. It should finish when the family get back together. Dracula wears a Magneto-style helmet and cloak as sunray protection. The whole story tells you that various people can like you because of your unique features but you can be happy only with your family and if you're not, happy people see you as a monster. The animation stands out in places. Backgrounds look very realistic, with proper texture, whether file piles in the office or the London Eye area. The whole thing is OK but lacks humour or genuine depth.

JIGSAW

Watchable. What a load of rubbish! Only for die-hard fans of the franchise. Jigsaw's been dead and buried for 10 years and should stay that way. Each part with multiple game players was inferior to the ones with an individual focus. In this one, additionally, all players get killed off. Only the final part is so-so. The killer is again an ex-player trained by Jigsaw 10 years earlier. There are bloody traps aplenty from the start and no suspense or tension whatsoever. Enough to know that and spare yourself watching this nonsense.

The last two movies seen courtesy of Cinema City.


LUX FILM DAYS

WESTERN

Walked out. Railway workers' life with some tension between two nationalities which doesn't make the film any more vibrant. The harassment by invisible perpetrators is just like in several class B thrillers.


USŁYSZ SKOLIMÓW. BO NAJWAŻNIEJSZY JEST GŁOS

Watchable. Times have come when you need a special campaign to promote making phone calls with your mobile. The commercial looks pretty standard, emphasising family relations. Nothing in the spot explains that Skolimow is where the House of Artists is located or what the clip actually promotes. It's the start of a long term campaign which will include a release of audiobooks with fairy tales read by the retired artists and a 1% tax soliciting project. Will be shown online to target 30-40+ year olds buying their parents handsets for Christmas. The makers believe the group will recognise the actors from the video. I wonder if the more-Polish people know them. I don't.


MY LITTLE PONY: THE MOVIE

Watchable. The ponies are each of a different pastel colour and the royal family are unicorns. They all have huge eyes and the evil-turn-good Tempest Shadow's eyes get bigger when she becomes good. The songs are mediocre. But the film looks cute, even the credits.

A BAD MOMS CHRISTMAS

Watchable. I liked their exploits at the first time but their Christmas is dumber and more vulgar and their mums are over the top nuts. Stop the series, please!

THE LEGO NINJAGO MOVIE

Watchable. I liked: Jackie Chan, feature inserts, spacious sound. I didn't: Polish dubbing which means you see English and hear Polish at the same time, in addition by voices much different from the original, the silly story. Numerous film icons get recycled here: Darth Vader, Transformers, kung fu, a suspension bridge. There's one mid-credit.

A LITTLE VAMPIRE 3D

Watchable. Finally a children's movie with a story and decent 3D. Vigo is a cute boy who has been 13 for about 300 years. It's a very good production, I just reckon more humour could be extracted out of such characters, especially the vampire-fearing guesthouse landlords.

LEATHERFACE

Watchable. The beginning was class B, just like earlier "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", to which it is a prequel, but shortly after the introduction of the psychokiller, sadistic family, you get a full size plot and suspense. What I detested was that in this movie it's women who are the evil ones, including one necrophilian. Completely the other way round than in real life statistics.

The last five movies seen courtesy of Cinema City again.